That's my Boy

Hi Blogies and Blogettes

I wasn't going to blog today but after reading and commenting on all your wonderful blogs I felt guilty, that and I wanted to write about the weekend.

As some of you might have gathered my hubby, 15 year old son, and 21 year old twin stepsons together with assorted friends, did a bike ride to raise money for Breast Cancer from London to Cambridge.

They set off with lots of water bottles (hubby forgot the bananas) to cycle the 8 miles to the start at Waltham Abbey at 6.15 a.m. Trying to be a good mum and relieved to have my house back from looking like a bike shop I got up to do them a light breakfast, make sure they had hats and sunscreen and to dutifully wave them off.

At this point I was worried that my "baby" would have problems, we only got his new bike on Thursday and apart from a week at school cadet camp and the odd summer rugby training he hadn't done much exercise and was a little apprehensive that a 66 mile bike ride up through the Hertfordshire and Cambridgeshire countryside might be a rather tall order for him. I knew hubby would look after him, and had no worries about him as he cycles 10 miles to work each day in the summer months to keep fit (well one of us in the family has too and it sure ain't me!)but still worried how he would do.

The hours went by and when it got to around mid-day I loaded the car with assorted chairs, blankets, disposable barbies, food and drink and off I set with my 12 year old to meet them at the finishing point at Mid-summers common beside the river in Cambridge, it's a lovely spot and you can watch all the punts go down the river. (sorry I almost forgot I should be very lucky this week as when I went out to the car a whole flock of birds had left their calling cards and being short in height I could only clean the top of the car with my son's supersoaker water gun - the neighbours are used to me!)

We arrived there in about an hour, and met up with one of the twins who had completed the ride and about 10 minutes later despite clipping the kerb and grazing his hands (it was so hot he had taken off his fingerless gloves and the blue dye in them was running down his hands) came my boy to a round of applause from the older ones who had only just beat him to the finish. Well I was so proud, they all said how my boy had done good, (although today he said his legs don't hurt too much , it's the sitting down!)

I know I shouldn't have doubted him, but as his mum I was worried that it was a long ride for his first attempt, but I really was chuffed he made it. On the other hand one of the twins didn't he did 38 miles but his legs gave up, so he had to wait several hours to be picked up by the race event organisers - whilst in the meantime the other rugby players that had undertaken the ride texted him with pictures of ice cold beer and burgers on the barbe!! he is now determined to start training and do it next year as he says he will never live down being outdone by his little brother!

By the way another reason I named this blog "That's my boy" is that exactly 16 years ago almost to the hour I went into labour with him and he reaches the grand old age of 16 at 7.16 a.m in the morning (although technically speaking it's his birthday now it is 1.29 a.m. British Summer Time) he was a day early, 2ft long and 9 1/2lb (which I think is between 41/2 and 5 kilos). I know people say labour is a wonderful experience but how? why? (I think that is a rumour put about by the male species) admittedly I was only in labour with him a short time,(about 5 1/2 hours) but with my eldest I was only 31/2 hours and when I went passed that point with him, I kept thinking I should have given birth by now - that and the midwife had told me to chant 10 green bottles sitting on a wall - again why?. I must admit although it is not trendy to so, I couldn't think of anything I enjoyed about labour it is painful and I threw up all the way through and even after I had given birth, I was still being so ill the midwife gave my cup of tea and toast to my husband!!! and the next day I was walking round rather like all those who did the bike ride (John Wayne eat your heart out!!) but proud of my new little boy.

In saying that about the labour, I wouldn't change having my kids for anything and can't believe that my baby is heading fast into manhood - after him only one more of my children to go through the dreaded teens and it is going to be really weird when he hits 18 - it is true the time we have with them good, bad or hormonal passes so quickly. I look back as I am sitting here hitting the keys and wonder where the hell did 16 years go, my son towers above me now and is almost 6 ft (his favourite saying is that he can't hear me all the way down here. I suppose it is a reminder to treasure them and cherish each moment of life I can't believe how fast it now seems to run away, I sometimes feel if I blink I will miss it.

Well enough of my ramblings, it was lovely to see your comments on the blogs and hi to Demi-goddess, it was funny I had just made a comment on Purchasewoods about how we perceive Australia to always be hot and full of sunshine, when you made your comment about it being cold, we can't equate it here , it's a bit like thinking of Switzerland and Austria as being hot, although I know they can be, as I have been there when it is up in the 30 degrees, but you still picture them as being like a christmas card scene all snowy and cold.

Nearly done, Lou I have my fingers crossed for you, Afkas - brill words can't express! I hope everything comes up roses for you both, Purchasewoods and Hollymark love your blogs and hearing about your neck of the woods and learning new lingo!! and FG 15 days and counting, Piave here we come!!

Have a brilliant week everyone, hope you are not too hot or cold!

Nite Nite bloggies and blogettes - from a proud mum

PS diet stops tomorrow, off to the chinese for my son's birthday and lots of chocolate cake when we get home - this will be followed by some sand bag making!!

Thank You

Hi blogies and blogettes

It's me back again, I know nothing in a week and then I go off on one, I won't go into long explanations, but I have had a lot of **** going on in my life at the moment which things that will mean major changes for me and I will rattle on in another blog once I hopefully get nearer to where I want/need to be.

But I thought I would come back to blog to say thanks for all your blogs - they make great reading and really cheer me up, as I have had a lot of downs lately!!

I can see from all of your writings that you are all artistic and talented writers, and love seeing your works however big or small, I always think wow they can all write, whereas me I write as I talk, too much and ramble all over the place with no format or construction, but that's me folks!!

It has been nice as well to see the others of FG's circle, a couple as you know I have met, and the other's I find it fascinating to hear of things around the world, places I have always wanted to visit and are on my to do list hopefully before I pop my clogs.

My friends think I am mad as I sort have a list of places to go and places to miss, they say I should have more of an open mind, but I am realistic and besides as usually being a very undecisive person, I never know what to buy the blue/red/yellow whatever etc!! I have decided there are places I don't want to go.(this is where my friends think I am loco, I go from totally indecisive to totally decisive in one swoop but with no rhyme or reason!!) But Canada, America and Australia have always been on my list as they are so vast and have such varying landscapes, I think I was also influenced as we had family and friends who used to come over as kids too - but being from a small cramped island, I always wanted to go, so if my numbers come up with the lottery who knows, if not it will be when all the kids grown up so quite a few years to go my youngest is 12 and we still have all the school and uni years to go!

I will just say another hi to FG as usual when one of us blogs the other pops up on Skype!! love and hugs xx

Well I'm off, it's starting to get hot, and my brain goes into meltdown, thanks once again for your great blogs, and your kind comments on mine, I hope you don't mind me waffling on yours too!!

Wherever you are have a great weekend!!!

Ciao Blogies and Blogettes

PS Lou hope you got the job and Afkas - I want to hear about the firemen - no excuses - no fear go girl!!

Hot and Bothered

Hi blogies and blogettes, It's hot! now to those of you that do not live on this tiny island, hot may be normal but we are not that used to it here. As we touched on the mess we are making of our planet recently, I will describe what happens here in the UK.

When I was younger we had proper winters, you know freezing cold, snow, ice miserable, foggy and lots of rain, then we had summers which were quite warm 70 or 80 degrees (I think that its 28 in centigrade - but I'm old so excuse the farenheit)but you did used to get the different season in the autumn in Sept leaves fall off the trees then by Oct/ Nov it got cold,Dec/Jan/Feb Freezing (I used to make lots of snowmen in the winter - my youngest hadn't seen snow till he was 10 - I remember when I was little my mum's god-daughter coming over from California and saying she had never seen snow, and thinking how weird,I thought everyone had seen snow - then thirty years later I never thought the same thing would happen here with my own kids!) By May it would warm up, till we had a summer in June, July & August.

Now, however we seem to have one long period of grey skies which look like they are going to rain but don't that often and when they do it causes flooding, we have a few really cold days which then halt everything and we have 8 hour queues on road (I kid you not it snowed at 3.30 p.m. and by 5 p.m. with only 2inches of snow it took me 51/2 hours to travel the 6 miles to pick my son up from school arriving there at 10.30 p.m. - we got home after midnight!) when it does snow they can't seem to grit the roads properly or the trains can't run, this is then followed by more grey skies and a few bursts of drizzle.

Then wham all of a sudden like this week the temperature rockets and yesterday we say record heat of 97 degrees (36)it was the hottest day in the UK since 1911. Da Essex girl will tell you, you usually have to get a boat, plane, or train to leave our island to find that sort of heat! Although I know with the exception of the Emerald Isle, all of you have to suffer much higher temperatures where you are in the world. However the heat here is not the same as abroad but is always muggy and humid, and of course us Brits are not acclimatised to hot weather we have 2 or 3 weeks a year where we run out and lay in the sun, get lobstered, peel and then back to work - Noel Coward was spot on Mad Dogs and Englishmen stay out in the mid-day sun,we are the only nutters on the beaches in the middle of the day!)

To add to this we can't use hoses as we have a drought order on, although yesterday I was close to standing in the garden and hosing us all down! it doesn't help either that I live in a big city which is now starting to suffer from smog and heat hazes due to the heat and traffic, asthma cases are on the rise especially in kids here.

I suppose I shouldn't really moan as in a couple of weeks I am off to Europe and I have been praying for sun as last year I think we had one of the wettest summers -Italy and France had severe flooding, we came back soggy, rusty and with webbed feet it was so wet - again in saying that the year before the heatwave in Europe killed hundreds, we travelled over the top of the Alps and it was 44 degrees at the top and Mont Blanc was one of the few mountains with snow on - another example of what a mess we are making of our planet.

I don't know if the Kyoto Agreement was the best or right one, but in a few years we are going to rue that our leaders didn't really try to save what we have, I wonder what we are leaving to our future generations if it has changed so much in my life time I wonder what will be left for our kids and grandkids, we have taken so much for granted so long, Europe are way ahead even on recycling and respecting the lack of water compared to the UK> But wherever we are in the world I think (and I admit I have probably been guilty in the past of neglecting them) we need to be looking around at our resources and cherishing them for one day at this rate they will be extinct as the dinosaurs and who knows maybe us with it!.

Sorry had a rattle on, it comes of being hot and bothered!! wherever you are have a great weekend!

Ciao Blogies and Blogettes

Counting our blessings

Hi blogies and blogettes,

Sorting through my son's space that he calls his room or rather lack of it,(why do pre-teenage and teenage kids loose the ability to see or use wardrobes or chest of drawers, they seem to think that the floor or any surface replaces them for storing/leaving clothes and almost everything else!!) I came across this prayer from his old school, when I read it, I realise how in the west many of us are cushioned from the harsh reality of life that many in this world have to suffer. The only time the majority of us get to think about it, is when Bob Geldof gets up and starts banging a drum for money for the third world, although in saying that, I know that there are many in poverty in our own countries too.

Reading this struck a cord with me and excuse the pun, gave me food for thought that perhaps we should try to take time out to look at just how we are blessed in our lives, for too many that just means being able to survive the day!


If you woke up this morning with more health than illness - you are more blessed than the million who will not survive the week.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture or the pangs of starvation - you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.

If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture or death - you are more blessed than three billion people in the world.

If you have food in the fridge, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep - you are richer than 75% of this world.

If you have money in the bank, in your wallet and spare change in a dish somewhere - you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If you can read this, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world that cannot read at all.


I hope that wherever you are you in the world, you are happy and blessed in all that you do!

Have a good week blogies and blogettes!!

Round in circles

Hi blogies and blogettes,

Not much of a blog today, my life seems to be going at full pelt at the moment but I feel that it's a bit like I'm going round in a circle cos I'm always busy and always seem to get nothing done!

After last week, had a great weekend the 40th was not at Clacton but at a small village called St.Osyth just outside, it was the first time we had been to our friend's house which was lovely, the garden sloped down to a lake, and outside their bedroom they had a large balcony overlooking the lake and hills, mind you in this country they are lucky if for a few short weeks they have sunshine and not rain to look out on, but it was nice and relaxed and good to see old friends and even the neighbours were sweet offering to put us up rather than let us drive back to London, although we did come back we were knackered by the time we got home in the early hours of Sunday morning!

But in saying that I was obviously meant to come back as on the Sunday I had three old friends call, all of which we have been through some awful times in their lives with them, one was totally devastated when a so called "friend" of ours run off with her then hubby (mind you she looks sooo much better now she has lost the 17 stone of ugly fat she was married to) and the other two both lost children, one was 7 and died of a rare cancer and the other was 8 and who died of Asthma. When I am feeling sorry for myself I think of them and count every one of my blessings that my kids are OK and healthy.

Life is so hectic nowadays, it is always good to catch up with old mates, it's awful that we have to try to find time to do this, months and years roll by so easily and it's often not deliberate but just the pace at which we live our lives and the way all our hours are filled up before we know it. I know each new year I promise myself to keep in touch with everyone, but here we are in July and nearer to the next year and I still struggle to make as many phone calls as I would like. (Although in saying that with the way I talk and ramble on so much - to my husband that is a relief, he thinks the phone lines would go into meltdown!)

Well in talking about rambles I know I am descending into one so I will shut up now -oh nearly forgot I need to curse the hit and run driver that wrote off my neighbours car and hit my hubby's bumper last night, the police did for a change actually catch him, as either he or his passenger was injured, not surprising if you saw the mess he made of the BMW he hit and put 8 feet up on the pavement! I am being quite restrained on my cursing considering in the last 12 months we have had 1 car written off, 1 with £8,000 of damage, 1 with £9,000 of damage and the other with £3,500 of damage, at this rate I will become un-insurable! and none of it has been either my or my hubby's fault. Definately enough moaning now, I'm chilled I'm thinking of Pirates!!

Hope your space wherever it is, is a happy one have a good week and keep blogging!


Ciao blogies and blogettes

Middle Age Crush

Hi blogies and blogettes, definitely a short one, I've got a mad hectic weekend, my son's off to cadet camp, so he gets a week in sunny cornwall to do all manner of boys things, and then we are off today to a 40th Birthday in Clacton (for those who don't know Britain, it's where people go for their last stop before they meet their maker, a sort of God's waiting room)so promise not a long blog.

Yesterday I went to see Pirates of the Caribbean under the pretext of taking my kids but in reality and this is the sad bit, it was to ogle at Johnny Depp for 2 1/2 hours, he may not be everyone's cup to tea but those eyes and cheekbones wonderful! (and all the other bits don't look bad too) mind you in saying that Orlando Bloom who is a wee bit on the young side for me didn't do bad at swashing his buckle either!!

So after ogling Johnny for the whole of the film (I think I got the storyline but was too busy thinking, if only in another life) I am totally chilled after the last week, although I have totally embarrassed my sons who think it's a bit sad their mum having a crush, but to I care NOOOO - who needs valium just let me at Johnny is what I say!! he looks gorgeous as that pirate!! aah, swoon, swoon - sorry I just lost it there again!!

Hope your space is a happy one wherever it is and you have a good weekend!!

Ciao blogies and blogettes xx

Ps once again love reading all your blogs!

Slimy No good thieving scum

Hi Blogies and Blogettes

If you are offended by ranting and bad language tune out now, cos I'm just about to go into one.

Today, whilst checking my bank account I found a direct debit made out to a company that I know I haven't used or even set foot in their shops this year, the money had already been taken out of my account!!!

On ringing my bank I found that a further two more direct debits had been set up to come out of my account too. Luckily I had looked today, as today was the first time money had been taken and the bank immediately cancelled the fraudulent direct debits and refunded the money.

However it still took me over 3 hours on premium rate numbers to get through to the fraud departments of these incompetant companies, all of which I have to pay for!! and when I finally got through it would appear that although they had my account number they had used a different name and address.

So much for the checking systems of the F******ing banks and companies, how in this computerised day and age can they set up direct debits without any of my pin numbers, passwords or signatures AAAAAAAAAAAGH, they are all obviously staffed or run by a bunch of F******ing moronic W***kers!! who couldn't run a piss up in a brewery.

As for the dirty no good thieving low life scum who committed fraud on my account, stealing from me and the companies why don't lazy F****ing tossers like you stop being parasites and get off your arses and get a job rather than thieving off of people who have worked for everything they have got, little as it is. People like you are the scum lowlife slimballs of the earth, you were not stealing because you were hungry or homeless you stole expensive mobile phones and charged them to my account, not knowing whether or not it would have left me with no money to feed my children or keep a roof over my head.

Wherever you are you scumbag I curse you and hope you have eternal bad luck and rot in hell you thieving piece of s**t. I hope one day you will realise that maternal things aren't everything when you are in the gutter and starving, I hope you get caught and get the relevant punishment slimball. People like you are a total waste of space! crawl back under your rock and stop wasting oxygen!


To everyone else, sorry folks my spleen needed venting, I am no only angry with the thief but with the incompetant ****** who all along the chain of banking did not do their jobs and allowed this to happen. I still have more calls to make and no doubt will be bothered by their numerous fraud departments over the next few weeks.

I was lucky that I spotted it so quickly, if it had been a store or company I used frequently, god knows how long it may have gone undetected and I could have been left struggling to pay for food and bills.

Sod it I'm going to name and shame the incompetant companies, Carphone Warehouse, H3G which is the 3 phone network, PAS Insurance for phones - Train your staff properly to do the correct checks, God knows how many times this has happened and how many people have suffered hardship and inconvenience as a result - GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER. (if my bank hadn't been so good refunding the money and putting checks on my account they would be here too, although the direct debit having a different name and address you think should have been flagged up)

Now I've not calmed down but feel better for getting that all out, hope your space wherever you are is a happy one and you have a good evening (that is everyone except the bastards who tried to steal my money - you have got a whole heap of my negative thoughts that are going to be heading your way!!!!)

ciao blogies and blogettes.

Right I think I'm chilled now!! breathe in breathe out, relax!!!

Gift or Curse?

Having extra senses, gift or curse?

This is a departure from my usual ramble, I don't know where to start this one really, do you believe we have extra senses or powers? I know that we have, but are they a gift or a curse?

Since I was little, I knew that my great gran, who was a fantastic strong, bright witty, intelligent tough woman had a gift or power, whichever term you want to call it. Nan was told by many psychics that she was a very gifted medium, she didn't court this but had a power nevertheless, she always had a strong sense of being around her I suppose you could call it an aura, but she never tried to expand or look into her powers to her, if things happened, they happened but she never chased after anything, to her it would have been a vanity in a practical world.

As a result of this my mother, aunt, cousin and myself have "senses", in the case of my mother and cousin, they don't need a telephone, and even before it rings or someone knocks at a door they will know who it is and what they are going to say - very handy and saves a fortune on phone bills - I've got better with this over the years, but I am still not quite up to their level. I know that when I think of someone often they ring or pop up - It happened as I was writing this, I was thinking of my daughter and the text went off, I knew it was her (for many this may not be unusual but I have had only rare contact with her over 71/2 years)but without looking I knew who it was from, and I was always totally confident that although we were apart that she was always OK - I won't say it was a belief or wishful thinking, because I knew, even though those around me thought I was weird), and as for my good mate FG very often when I am commenting or reading her blog, up she pops!

However going back to the powers I seem to have along with my aunt inherited (who also is the person that I am most physically like - yup and you guessed it, my cousin is physically like my mum) a power or gift is a little more dark, you see we see the death side of things. It's happened too many times for it to be a coincidence, and I even took to telling people if I saw or knew something so that it wouldn't be put down as coincidence or people wouldn't think I had a screw loose - by that I don't mean I could ever warn people of what was going to happen. I find that it always takes one or two forms :

The first I "see" or know what happens, but not when and to who, this is usually in the form of accidents or something preventable and the other way is that I know who something is going to happen to, but I also know that nothing will stop that happening - such as terminal illness, even it it hasn't been diagnosed.

It led me to believe that what will happen, will happen and what will be, will be, and that part of our fate can't be changed. I think this is sometimes illustrated by people who can fall out of a tall building and live and others that trip up a kerb and die.

The other part of me, the logical part likes to scream out it can't be that simple, that it is all mapped out, and when our time is up however long or short it is up, but my "gift or curse" has always proved it to be otherwise.

It is also weird that we all four of us seem to act as an attraction or beacon for other people with gifts or senses out there, all through my life I have had people come up to me because they said they had to, I must have some sort of psychic neon sign on my head. One of the first to do this introduced himself as a Warlock, he said that he had "seen" I had a power, he explained that we all have something, but we were a little like radios where some people could tune in and others couldn't, he said when I was ready that I should get myself properly trained to tune in. I still have never done this and you will see further downbelow some of the reasons why I haven't so far.

In addition to the warlock, there was someone I used to work with, he had a deck of playing cards and one night said to pick one, I did what he asked, thinking it was a magic trick, he then laid out a number of cards and proceeded to tell me that he had to do a reading, he had been drawn to me, he predicted the birth of my daughter and that I wouldn't remain with my partner, and even that many years later I would have to have two emergency ops, one of which would bring me near to death (he made me choose another card then announced it would be touch and go but that I would get over it), he also said that I wouldn't be rich but be comfortable!! (bugger!!)The man's wife at the time went mad, she knew he had a gift and had begged him for a reading on many occasions, then out of the blue he picked me and until then I knew nothing about it, he wouldn't read for anyone else but said that he had to for me! For the record what he said came true, but I am still working on the rich thing!

Then on another occasion I had a 7th daughter of a 7th daughter walk up to me introduce herself and tell me she was going to "read me", well over the years I may not have got myself properly tuned in but I can block as well as send "oh no you are not", I replied she smiled and tried, but instead of getting through to me, she picked up things from people either side of me, realising this, she said she would "read me" from something else, then promptly looked at my handbag, she described people whose photos I had inside and then described where my ex, my daughter's father lived and at no time did she touch my bag and would have had no way of knowing that, again she told me to get myself trained! (where I wouldn't have had a clue)!

It got to a point when it was happening almost all of the time, and can be a hard thing to live with. One of the clearest for me was when my dad became ill, the Doctors told us he was cured, but I knew they were wrong, I remember saying to them that I knew he had cancer and that it had gone to his brain and asking how long he had to live , I had just celebrated my 17th birthday a couple of days before and I think they thought I was rude and brash, but I just knew I was right, I remember my mum and uncle standing there opened mouthed trying to hush me up. Dad was ill for a short while (about 6 weeks)after that and I looked after him at home, but found it hard to stay in the same room with him, as I knew it would play havoc with my head after, I hope this doesn't sound cruel, but I just knew what I knew.

Then one day when I came home from school - it had taken me over 2 1/2 hours and I was drenched, my mum told me not to go to the hospital that night, almost immediately and within moments of them leaving I knew it was the last night I could have gone to see him, but it was too late and way before mobile phones were invented, so I couldn't call them back to come and get me.

Later on, in the middle of the night the phone rang, dad had gone into a coma, this time with my grandad and mum I insisted I go, as I walked into the ward at 5 a.m. I looked at the clock and knew my dad would be dead by 10 o'clock, although the Doctors were saying he would be in a coma for about a month or so, but I knew, my dad laid there for a number of hours, then took a breath and didn't let it out, as I went to get help I looked at the clock and the minute hand went onto 10 which was when he died. At the same time at home, which was about 10 miles away, my dog went mad, he was running all over the house, howling and jumping up at the windows and doors, so much so that my nan had to wake my brother up, to control him. Gift or curse? I don't know, but that five hours waiting was some of the longest of my life and I never doubted, that what would be, would be and my dad would be dead by 10 a.m.

In saying all of that above there has been occasion where I think my gift saved me and not just physically.

To explain this, I have to say that I have seen things too (no I am not mad,and no I can't explain it, only describe it). One of the first things I saw was a shape or energy ball type thing, it was three things but joined as one, it was glowing a sort of white, with gold/green aura coming off of it, I was so scared at what I was seeing, because I was seeing it, I knew it wasn't evil or out to harm me, but also knew it wasn't meant to be there, I tried to scream but although my mouth was moving, nothing came from my vocal chords, I remember thinking please, please go away I can't deal with this - and it turned and went out the door. I've seen it on more than one occasion and always knew it wasn't evil, but didn't know what to do either.

However to every good there is a bad, one night I suddenly had a vision, I saw myself clearly driving down the road that I took every day to work, as I looked ahead the street lights appeared to go off, I then went to turn and the road ahead went black and my car seemed to go into a sort of limbo with the engine roaring, I then thought "don't be silly get a grip," but as I looked up I then saw a single black hooded figure, I have never seen anything so dark or black, the nearest thing I could describe it as is like being one of the Ringwraiths from Lord of the Rings, but without the ragged clothes this was more like a monk's robe, but nothing but darkness where the face should be, I felt in that moment that I was looking at pure evil and perhaps death.

Terrified unable to move, I said over and over in my head "no it's not my time, this is not right, I then started to receit the Lord's Prayer, I got to the part where it says "deliver us from evil" when this thing turned and glided out of the room. As it did that I saw another vision, I was high up in a church looking down on the altar which was covered with a purple cloth, but above me were stained glass windows but not in the usual bright colours they were gold and beige colours.

The next day I had such a strong urge to go to church, I went to the local church which was shut, and remembered some of my friends attended a church that had a late service, hesitantly I drove there, and walked in, and yes there I was looking at the church I had seen with muted coloured stained glass windows with a high choir pit, which was the place where I had looked down from! I stood at the back, not quite knowing what had brought me there, when I heard the priest say anyone who wants to learn more see me after - the rest for me is history as I found my faith. (I am not going to preach religion on this one, but I believe what I saw was for a reason, and coincidentally I have never, ever, ever driven that exact route since that day, so my gift you could say saved me in both ways). (I also found out that they use the purple altar cloth for funerals) How does this fit in with my faith, again I don't know, maybe one day when the time is right, all will become clear.

It's funny but I never told my aunt of the black figure, however a couple of years later, she said to me how her previous husband had turned to the occult and she always knew when he was back in the country and he would send a single black hooded figure (the description she gave was the same as mine) and it would hover and then glide out of the room (her previous husband had also tried to kill her by setting fire to her house). My aunt like me has many visions and like me never on much that is cheerful, and it was strange how in both cases the figure turned and went, it also seemed to almost hover about 2 ft off the ground.

Through all this I have always felt that my grandfather (his mum was my nan with the powers) is my guardian angel for want of a better word, he has looked out for me and I have felt on some occasions that he was definitely there to protect me, and yes again my aunt was told by one of the pyschic people she had come up to her, that they could see a man by her - and described my grandad who died in 1969) so I think he looks after both of us.

There are loads of other things that have happened, but my blog would become a book if I rattled through them all, I have as the years go by tried to channel the good and positive things, I still see things, and have even felt people pass over, when they have died,- it is if they wait and see if everything is OK with the ones they have left behind before they let go - I have written that - but can't explain it.

I can also see the evil or bad aura around some, and no I don't just mean when someone is horrid or just a pain. Once I made the mistake of letting a friend persuade me to go to a psychics fair, not for myself but because someone she was going with dropped out, it was weird, you could feel that there were fakes in the room, and some genuine, but amongst them there were some that were evil, sitting there looking friendly with smiles on their faces and with brightly coloured stalls to draw people in, but whatever they gave off was pure evil underneath. With my "gift" when something happens or something is present that shouldn't be, the hairs on my body stand on end and that horrible shiver you get when it's not cold but as if someone was walking over your grave runs through your body. I didn't know their motives and wouldn't want to guess, perhaps they were there for the vunerable souls, I pushed my friend well away from them, and guess what when we sat down for her reading the medium picked up things from me again (I must have some sort of antenna!!), so with that I got up and went outside.

For myself I keep away from organised things and events like that, I see enough, maybe I should have tried to tune in more, I don't know what is out there waiting, but I believe that it's more powerful than we can ever imagine, I try and I know I often fail to look for the good and think to the positive but here's hoping truly some of it rubs onto the circle.

Well finished this bit for now bloggies and blogettes, after reading this if you haven't fell asleep, probably think I am mad - perhaps I am, I can't explain what happens I also can't turn it off and on at will, I just know what I know and the jurys still out if it is a gift or curse.

Having read all of this I wasn't sure whether to publish it, but I said I would give you "me" and this is part of the things good or bad that make up me.

I hope your space wherever it is a peaceful and happy one! have a good weekend!

Ciao blogettes xx

Rollercoaster Week


Hi bloggies and blogettes

Only another short one, it has been an up and down week for me and apart from dropping in to read all the wonderful blogs linked through FG, I haven't had time to sit down and get my act together (as it is 5 to 1 in the morning here in London it is unlikely that I will do that now)

Although I've probably made comments on all the blogs linked to FG I thought I'd say how much I have enjoyed reading and looking at them, you all are talented writers and I look forward your future blogs! and thanks again to Hollymark for the tips on how to insert pictures etc, as you can see haven't had chance to put it into practice yet!

At this point I'd better warn you all I'm a total chatterbox, and my mind rambles all over the place and back again and then some more, and no I am not exaggerating but it is very much "me", people have tried to shut me up over the years but it just bursts out cos I have to be "me" and off I go!

Now I was going to put in something about my dear friend FG but as I was thinking about her and had just started to type - up she pops on skype, I often finds that happens between us - after almost 40 years (God, I can't believe it's that long!!) of friendship we often know when one of us is having a down day and know without saying that we will always be there for each other.

I always feel blessed for having her in my life and I don't think it is a coincidence that our other halves get on brilliantly too, they enjoy sinking a few (sorry lots)of Grappas or Guinnesses together and any time that we get to spend with them is time we always know we will have love and laughter (and hangovers). I can honestly say we have never left each other without smiling and feeling good and in today's world that is rare and something I treasure.

As for my rollercoaster week, some of it has been **** but it's ending on a high, cos I know that in just a short while I will be off to see my old friend - this year it was a bit on impulse as it is looking likely that I will be loosing my job - but hey it's just money and you only live once and I might as well spend it on going somewhere that I love to see people I want to be with, as my gran used to say - you can't take it with you!

Finally to Lou, if you read this I hope that it finds you better - look after yourself, to "da Housewife" I hope you have had a good weekend and no more sproglettes with broken bones/bruises(can you believe it, Wimbledon's on and it's sunny - must be all the global warming!!)and to FG hope the gig is a brilliant one and as ever love and hugs.

Hope you space is a happy one wherever it is and you enjoy your weekend!

caio blogettes sleep in peace - night, night time now for bed xx